I recently was able to purchase a manufactured home in a
small Oregon town heavy on farms, orchards, open space and light on traffic
(and traffic lights!). I had lived in
an apartment since retiring from Safeco Life and Investments in 2003 and
selling my mobile home in the Seattle Metro area and moving back to
Oregon. I didn’t fully realize until I
was actually moved into my new home and began to get settled how totally happy
I was. I suppose much of the feeling
came simply from a new environment and new experiences. However, the longer I am here, the more I
realize how many factors there are in one’s life that lead to happiness or
the lack of it.
Primarily, of course, our happiness depends on our attitude
about life. Our attitude can be
influenced by many things: friends,
relatives, social interaction, money, power, culture, ideals, spiritual
activity, environment, and on and on.
What influences we accept as contributing factors in how we live most
certainly results in the quality of life we have. I believe that due to our inherent social nature we enjoy sharing
our lives with others who are important to us in some way. When we feel good and enjoy life, we like to
share those feelings with friends and family.
Conversely, when we are in the dumps we may tend to share those feelings
with others as well. If we are lucky,
our friends and family may rise to the occasion to be supportive and help us
through the current challenges.
Sometimes, not so much!
One of the things I have always done when I was not clear
about what I should do about some issue, I rearrange my furniture. Many times I rearranged the furniture in the
office where I was working if there was a particularly difficult issue that
needed to be resolved. I have done the
same in my home from time to time. It
just seemed that rearranging the way things were outwardly gave me a new
arrangement in my thinking and feeling that would lead to resolving the
concern.
It is a major rearrangement when we make a physical
move from one home to another. I won’t
go into the potentials of moves that constitute a “running from” some
situation. That is another story for
another time. What I am interested in
is a move that truly comes about because one has begun an inner rearrangement
of priorities and interests. I had been
feeling the urge to make a move, literally, for about a year. I dabbled at looking at manufactured homes. It was interesting that I never actually
went in any! Driving by was my way of
flirting with the notion of a move. I
shared my process with only one other person.
Then I received a notice of a rent increase coming up at my
apartment. The rent on my storage
locker had already gone up. That was
the catalyst that produced a serious consideration of the pros/cons of
purchasing a home. I had seen a listing
of a home in Dallas, Oregon and decided to drive down for a look. To make a long story short, I turned out to
be looking at the wrong listing. The
mobile park was large and consisted of two separate, but connected parts. As I was driving through the adjacent park,
thinking the one I was originally looking for was not what I wanted, I stopped
to pick up a flyer for one of the homes.
As I was getting ready to get back in my truck, I saw a lady come up the
street waving her hands. She said, “Do
you want to look inside?” I paused in
surprise, then, said, “Yes. I would.”
It was exactly the home I wanted.
I quickly contacted the sales agent and arranged for a
meeting. I offered considerably less than
the seller was asking, even after it had been reduced in price. I also was asking the seller to take half
the offer in a note for three years. The agent’s jaw dropped when I told him
what my offer was, but he dutifully submitted it to the seller, who now lives
in Arizona. A few days later I got the
word, “Start packing. Your offer was
accepted.” Not even a counter offer.
There were many “co-incidental” factors to the whole
process, but to mention one is the fact that I had been living in Greenway Square
Apartments. This home was located
in Greenway Mobile Park. The
similarity was not lost on me.
Now, to get to the “Your Happiness is Your Job” part,
I wanted to share my good fortune with others.
The result from others was varied, primarily supportive from the ones
joining in my happiness. One person in
particular found it necessary to dump on my choice of making such a move. Seems an inter-personal issue made the person
think my action was somehow directed at offending him. Go figure!
I was taken aback and frankly, it took me awhile to determine not to let
any dissenter decide my happiness. Some
folks just can’t stand to see others happy when they are not.
I have had more happiness and interest in life in the last
six weeks than I have had in the last five years! In response to the dissent, I am reminded of the words of Edwin
Markham:
He drew a circle that shut me
out-
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle and took him In!
From the poem " Outwitted”
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle and took him In!
From the poem " Outwitted”
To fully enjoy my happiness, it is necessary for me to
express the ability to include others in a loving embrace. What the other person does with that love is
up to him/her.
